Subtitle: This blog post will discuss how text messaging is used in today's dating culture and the benefits and drawbacks of using this form of communication as it relates to courting.
Text messaging has widely become one of the most utilized forms of communication in today’s technologically advanced world. And this fares no differently for the dating scene. But how appropriate is it to express your affection for someone in 120 characters or less? This is a topic that I am personally conflicted about. I have to admit: I am an avid texter. It’s not that I don’t like phone calls, but I find text messages so quick and efficient. When you are on the phone with someone, it is hard to do anything else without being completely obvious that you are not paying attention to them and only them. With text messaging, I can have multiple conversations running at a time and still be doing other things like working, writing emails, or even doing the laundry. But in my own dating adventures, I still find myself saying, “I wish he would actually pick up the phone and call me,” because there is something unique about hearing someone’s voice, their laugh, or their jokes that just can’t be replaced with a short-form scribe.
As a topic that not only interests me but perplexes me on a daily basis, I decided to poll some friends to see what their opinions were on text messages as it relates to dating. Sean, 27, brought up a really great point when he said, “Text message has created immediacy. I can contact my person of interest at any time during the day.” In this way, texting has created an on-going conversation with a potential mate, spouse or loved one that keeps the pair in touch all day long. We no longer have to wait for a phone call to see what the other is doing; we can send a quick text message to update the other on our status. I can concur that this is a nice touch; I love getting those mid-afternoon text messages that say, “How is your day going?” It’s nice to know that someone is thinking about me and is interested in knowing how I am fairing with life that day.
It would be fair to say that texting is an important part of the communication tools that one has to utilize on a daily basis, so much so there is almost an “alternate language” that has been created. Jeff, 30, said, “Texting has become such a dominant form of communication that we even invented emoticons to emulate facial expressions to express inner feelings.” The emoticons he refers to are the “:-)” symbols to express smiling or happy, “:-(“ to express sad or disappointed, etc. It really is incredible the things that humans have come up with in order to connect to other human beings, to express emotion even if they are not face to face. Further, Jeff noted that, “Text messaging brings out peoples’ characteristics that normally they may be too shy to show, in a way taking away insecurities. Text messaging takes away the element of communication apprehension.” In this way, people are able to “be more like themselves” without the fear of messing up a phone conversation with awkward moments.
Text messaging has quickly become a favorite form of communication for people, even when it comes to dating. Whatever their reason is, it has become an accepted “norm” in our courting culture. However, there are some boundaries that I personally think should be followed, which are summed up nicely in this article titled, “Dating Tips 101: Text Messaging in Relationships” which you can read here: http://www.examiner.com/sex-and-dating-in-phoenix/dating-tips-101-text-messaging-relationships
But even I, who vows to love text messaging for the ease and convenience of it, am a walking contradiction when it comes to dating and texting. What about the fact that it’s easier to hide things through text messages? Or the uneasy feeling I have of getting to know someone through characters versus actually hearing their voice and sharing a joke together over the phone? Call me old fashioned, but even in this technologically advanced world, nothing replaces the sound of that special someone’s voice that makes me grin from ear to ear.
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